Unit 4

How many times have you felt angry whit your self because you were too shy to speak up when you really wanted to have to conversation whit others person? Are parties times for standing in the corner and watching others chat and dance-afraid to join them? Do you listen to discussions but do not give your opinions because you think you are not smart enough? Do you wish you be friendly but don’t know how? All these thoughts lead to unhappy feelings.
This kind of unhappiness comes about not because other people are trying to heart us. We make this unhappiness for ourselves. Naturally, we really don’t to hurt ourselves, but often we group up thinking we are not as good as others-we are inferior everyone is better, smarter, and more interesting. These negative thoughts make us shy. Why do we do this to ourselves? Only a psychologist can discover the reasons, it is interesting to note that very large numbers of people are shy. There is, however, good news. If we want to get rid of shyness, it can be done.
We can help our selves be rid of shyness. Nobody is perfect, and everybody has good qualities. It is fair to pay attention to our imperfections and overlook our good qualities? Definitely not! The following suggestions may be helpful in reducing shyness.


1.First, understand that you cannot eliminate shyness overnight. It is a slow process that you must work in gradually.
2.Think about situations when being shy is most painful. Perhaps your biggest problem is making small talk with a stranger at the party. In that case, prepare yourself whit some interesting current news to talk about. The weather is a topic often used for starting conversation
3.Getting the other person to talk about himself/herself is a clever idea. Many people enjoy talking about themselves –or giving their opinions. For example, you can say something like, ”I notice you like modern jewelry; your rings are very unusual. Did you design them yourself?” This can be the start of a friendship.
4.Whenever you begin making negative comparisons between yourself and others force yourself to stop doing that immediately. Take your thought s of yourself. Observer
Others and thinks of a compliment with which to start a conversation with someone
5.If you are shy at work where there are many coworkers, choose the least intimidation person to the perhaps have coffee with or make casual small talk with.
6.Knows that if in effort to socialize sometimes in unsuccessful, it happens to everyone now and then. Fell proud of yourself for making the effort.
7.If you are required to give a report to a group, tell them that you fell nervous. This feeling is quite natural. And everyone can sympathize, Expressing that the group will make you fell better.
8.Think about your good qualities and believe that you are as good as anyone else…. Because you are!
9.Take a course in developing self- confidence or read books on the subject.

Life is much more enjoyable for people who are not shy

Berapa kali anda merasa marah sedikitpun diri anda karena anda terlalu malu untuk berbicara ketika anda benar-benar ingin memiliki percakapan dengan orang lain?Apakah kali pihak untuk berdiri di sudut dan menonton orang lain chatting dan tari –takut untuk bergabung dengan mereka?Apakah anda mendengarkan diskusi tetapi tidak memberikan pendapat anda karena anda pikir anda tidak cukup pintar? Apakah anda ingin anda bersikap ramah tetapi tidak tahu bagaimana? Semua pikiran ini mengarah pada perasaan tidak bahagia,.
Semacam ini ketidakbahagiaan datang sekitar bukan karna orang lain yang ingin menyakiti kita. Kami membuat ketidakbahagiaan ini untuk diri kita sendiri. Tentu, kami benar –benar tidak menyakiti diri kita sendiri, tetapi sering kita kelompok berpikir kita tidak sebaik yang lain kita rendah, setiap orang baik, cerdas, dan lebih menarik..Pikiran negatif membuat kita malu. Mengapa kita melakukan ini untuk diri kita sendiri? Hanya seorang psikolog dapat menemukan alasan. Sangat menarik untuk dicatat bahwa jumlah sangat besar orang yang pemalu. Ada, namun, kabar baik. Jika kita ingin memikirkan rasa malu hal itu dapat dilakukan .
Kami dapat membantu diri kita sendiri terbebas dari rasa malu. Tidak ada orang yang sempurna, dan semua orang memiliki kualitas yang baik. Apakah adil untuk memperhatikan ketidaksempurnaan kita dan mengabaikan kualitas baik kita? Tentu tidak! Saran-saran berikut ini
Mungkin membantu dalam mengurangi rasa malu

1 Pertama memahami bahwa anda tidak dapat menghilangkan rasa malu semalam. Ini ada proses yang lambat yang harus bekerja secara bertahap
2 Pikirkan tentang situasi kita sedang pemali yang paling menyakitkan. Mungkin masalah terbesar anda adalah membuat pembicaraan kecil denagn orang asing di sebuah pesta. Dalam hal ini mempersiapkan diri sedikitpun saat ini baru beberapa yang menarik untuk dibicarakan. Cuaca adalah topik yang sering digunakan untuk memulai percakapan.
3.Mendapatkan orang lain untuk berbicara tentang diri sendiri adalah ide cerdas. Banyak orang senang berbicara tenrtang diri mereka sendiri-atau memberikan pendapat mereka. Sebagai contoh, anda dapat mengatakan sesuatu seperti, “Saya melihat anda seperti perhiasan modern: cincin anda sangat luar biasa apakah anda desain mereka sendiri?,” Hal ini dapat manjadi awal persahabatan.
4.Setiap kali anda memula membuat perbandingan negatif antara diri sendiri dan orang lain, memaksa diri untuk berhenti melakukannya segera. Ambil pikiran anda sendiri. Lain mengamati dan memikirkan pujian yang dapat digunakan untuk memulai percakapan dengan seseorang
5.Jika anda enggan bekerja dimana terdapat banyak rekan kerja, pilih orang yang paling menakutkan kemungkin memiliki kopi dengan atau berbasa-basi dengan santai
6 Tahu bahwa jika dalam usaha untuk mensosialisasikan kadang-kadang tidak berhasil, hal itu terjadi pada semua orang sekarang dan kemudian buat bangga diri anda untuk membuat upaya
7.Jika anda diminta untuk memberikan laporan ke group, mengatakan kepada mereka bahwa anda merasa gugup. Perasaan ini sangat alami, dan setiap orang dapat bersimpati. Menyatakan bahwa kelompok akan membuat ada merasa lebih baik
8.Pikirkan tentang kualitas yang baik dan percaya bahwa anda sebaik orang lain…Karna anda
9.Mengikuti kursus dalam mengembangkan kepercayaan dri atau membaca buku tentang subjek.
Hidup akan lebih nyaman bila kita merasa tidak malu

Comprehension Check
TRUE/FALSE

Are following statements true/false ? Circle the correct answer.


1.Not many people are shy. (F)
2.Others make us shy. (F)
3.Shy people have negative thought about themselves. (F)
4.At a party, try to speak whit at least one person. This is a first step in fighting shyness. (F)
5.Giving someone a compliment is a good why to start small talk. (T)
6.Shyness should be kept a secret. (T)
7.Every person has good qualities. (T)
8.We can quickly eliminate shyness when we decide to do that. (F)
9.We can reduce shyness whit a step-by-step plan. (T)
10.Only perfect people are not shy. (F)




Vocabulary Development

Fill in the blanks whit appropriate words from the list to complete the following sentences.

1.Yolanda was very sad when her died, and all her friends sympathized whit her. They knew how much she loved her cat.
2.Paul wants to become a doctor, Naturally, he has to go to school for many years and work very hard.
3.When Debbie said she wanted to go to china for two months, her family had many suggestions before deciding to let go.
4.It is interesting to observe how students act on the first day of school. Some are relaxed, but most are shy and uncomfortable.
5.Many little children sleep with a small light on in their rooms, because darkness is intimidating to them.
6.Kaisha didn’t like her new haircut at all, but she knew her hair would grow long again gradually.
7.When Maria goes to a party, she loves to get compliments on her pretty dress.
8.Stephen loves to shop in department stores. He always gives away his old clothes and wears the current fashions.
9.Sra like to express her opinions on everything even if nobody wants to hear them. Sometimes she is dislike because of this.
10.A grade of 100% is a perfect score. It means that the student made no mistake on the test.
11.When Min Chen to Queens Collage she discovered that many people from her city in china were also students there.
12.When Carlos wanted to have a party for his wife, he asked for discussions for interesting food to prepare. After many friends to help him, he decided to use his favorite old recipes.
13.Applying to collage means sending in an application. Getting records from high school, writing your life story, and going for interviews. It is a long process, and it makes students nervous.
14.My friends think that smoking is a dirty and dangerous habit. I agree whit their negative opinion.
15.People who want to lose weight should eliminate candy and ice cream from their diet.